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Essay On Mother Should Not Go Out To Work

Let's face it: most of us would love to work part-time. But few of us have that luxury. Instead, we must choose between staying at home or working full-time. Both scenarios have their pluses and their hardships. Here's a look at one of the biggest decisions you make as a mom.

Working Moms: Benefits

For you

It's gratifying to know your 6-month-old loves you and so does your boss. Although you cherish your family, you'll appreciate that not everything in life revolves around them. Working also keeps you in the game career-wise, helps you stay connected to the larger world, and satisfies your natural yearning for intellectual stimulation. Because, while you love your baby to bits, she doesn't read the morning paper.

For your kids

Your baby won't understand the benefits of that extra paycheck, but there's another perk she will enjoy. "Our babysitter adores my children," says Holly Gordon, a New York City mother of a 3-year-old and a 1-year-old. "And I am convinced that the more people who love them, the better." You may even find that your kid learns to do things for herself earlier and faster than the kids of stay-at-home moms (though some working moms feel just the opposite!).

For your relationship

It's easier to stay in sync when you and your partner are both clocking hours on the job. He understands what you do all day and knows how hard it can be. He doesn't assume you should be on diaper duty after work, and he's less likely to take you for granted when you're on the home front. Keeping the spark in your marriage may also take less effort than if you stayed home, because part of you  -- the savvy working woman  -- still resembles the person he married.

Working moms: Drawbacks

For you

First, there's the guilt. Your heart will break on those mornings when your anxious toddler is clinging to your leg, desperate for you to stay home. And hearing the wonderful things your baby did while you were away will likely be bittersweet. Plus, shuttling from work to home and back again means you will be constantly shifting gears. Cramming in quality time with your child before and after long hours on the job can be exhausting, particularly when your baby is ill or fussy. But the area that will suffer most is "you time."

For your kids

Your baby will miss you. There will be days when he falls down at daycare and will cry in the arms of someone else, wanting nothing more than to be with you. When he gets older, he'll complain that you weren't around enough (of course, if you'd stayed home, he might complain you smothered him!). Thankfully, your child will do the healthy thing  -- get very attached to the people who care for him when you're away.

For your relationship

Things will fall by the wayside, and sometimes that thing will be your husband. Saying goodbye to home-cooked dinners and perfectly folded laundry may be okay for him, but he will have a harder time knowing that, at the end of the day, you're all out of hugs and want nothing more than a hot bath and a soft bed. When you're ready, hire the occasional night or weekend sitter. "Going out for a cup of coffee or a movie after the kids are in bed is a great way for working parents to reconnect without feeling like they're taking more time away from their little ones," says Claire Lerner, a director at Zero to Three, a Washington, D.C.-based nonprofit support group.

Stay-at-Home Moms: Benefits

For you

Babies are delicious, and watching them develop is miraculous. As your baby's primary soother and cuddler, you will know him better than anyone else, and you'll be around for every milestone, big and small. Staying home will streamline your life  -- it won't make things less stressful, but it will keep you focused. You can also make some of your best buddies during these early years. "It's an easy time for women to connect  -- even shy ones  -- because you have all that time to bond," says Lexi Welanetz, the director of the Family Resource Counseling Center in Los Angeles.

For your kids

Having mom roll out of bed every morning ready for duty is a cozy situation from a baby's perspective. Even the most dedicated daycare worker or the sweetest sitter can't come close. There's no shifting gears in the morning, no daily separation anxiety, no confusing inconsistencies in routine, like when naptime is or what snacks are allowed. "I think my kids really benefit from the stability that comes from the same person disciplining and instructing them," says Lori Stepp, a mother of three in Durham, North Carolina. "It's not that I get on the floor and play with them all the time. It's just that I think they're very comforted knowing I'm there."

For your relationship

Because it's your job to hold down the fort, when your baby gets sick, you and your husband aren't going to butt heads over whose turn it is to miss work. And while picking up the dry cleaning with a child in tow can be a drag, having the whole day to do it means that when your partner is off, you can be, too. "I'm not squeezing in housecleaning, grocery shopping, and errands after work," says Lisa Sinton, a mother of two in Brooklyn, New York. "When my husband gets home, we can spend time together."

Stay-at-home moms: Drawbacks

For you

In a word: boredom. If efficiently ticking off tasks on a to-do list is important to you, then staying home may feel more like purgatory than heaven. At the same time, your job never stops. Even when the baby is in bed, it's tempting to sort through laundry or pluck toys off the playroom floor. Make sure to carve out some time for yourself every week.

For your kids

Some stay-at-home moms feel their babies are clingier than those of working moms. There's no question that your child will be relying on you and you alone  -- a habit that can be hard to kick. Adjusting to preschool is sometimes challenging for such kids. After all, a classroom of toddlers is a far cry from the charmed life of Mommy and me. "Make sure your baby gets to spend time with other children," says April Nesin, Ph.D., a pediatric psychologist at St. Louis Children's Hospital. "That way, he gets a taste of life when he's not the center of the universe."

For your relationship

Remember the good old days when you and your husband spent hours venting about your jobs? Well, if you stay home, the first thing you're going to want to talk about when he walks through the door is, When is he taking the baby off your hands? That can be cause for conflict, since after a day at work he wants a break, too. Couples say the best way to deal is first to give him time to unwind (30 minutes tops) and then take the break you deserve.

  • If a mother stays home, the risk of both parents dying and leaving children orphaned is reduced.

    Man is mortal. If something happens and both working parents die while outside the home, who will take responsibility for those orphaned children? That's why mothers should stay at home and look after their children. Men are harder workers, so they're the better choice to hold a job. Plus, by having the mother at home raising the children, have a higher chance of being more righteous and well-behaved.

  • Day care is the ruination of this country.

    Mothers should stay home and raise their own children. Mothers who place their babies, especially newborn babies, in day care, and leave them there 40-50 hours per week are causing irreparable damage to the development of the baby; he or she will grow up with some sort of attachment disorder. Most children are left in day care these days, and that is one reason why the crime rate is so high, why prisons are overcrowded, why bullying is rampant in schools, why school violence is prevalent. We are raising unattached, conscienceless children because we are leaving them at five to six weeks old in the care of inadequate, poorly staffed day care centers, and our babies are growing up without the capacity to love, feel empathy and compassion, and to have healthy relationships with people. It should be a law for someone--whether it's the mother or father--to stay at home and care for the baby until the child reaches the age to attend preschool.

  • I totally agree

    If women want to work than having kids will be such a disaster. In fact, the most important thing to kids is having their mother next to them to fell comfortable. I don t think mothers should work to bring money, that's men's business, but in some cases like divorce or if the man died then the mother is obliged to work instead of him.

  • I Agree Moms Should Stay Home & Watch After Their Kids.

    I think moms should stay home with their kids and teach them the good & the bad. Why leave them alone? When you don't even know what they are doing? That's how kids ( teenagers) learn to do bad stuff. Your responsibly is taking care of your children's. Let the father work, some kids feel lonely because their parents work a lot . But the kids are always first.

  • Women should stay at home, and take care of the children.

    Since million years, generation to generation, women have been taking and looking after the children, which brings the result where society accepted and allowed the fact where women is taking care-after the children in general. So here, what I want to say, what I wish to express, is the society effects of the topic. I strongly believe that men go out for work, and women stay at house and look after the children makes society runs better. To link my opinion to evidence, even in my history text book, which is an educational proof, on page 103, on the bottom of the page, there is ‘source D’, explaining the failure and bankruptcy of society during Industrial Revolution when women was going out for work. In it, there is one phrase by one of the woman’s husband saying “Come, lass, come home for I cannot keep this child quiet and the other I have left crying at home.” He is saying that as women start to go out for work, everything behind runs to waste, this not only include ‘Happy, united family’, but errors occurred such as women turned very strong and turf due to heavy workings, and they do not act like women anymore. For example, they started to form clubs and meet together to drink, sing and smoke. Furthermore, women began to use the lowest, most brutal and most disgusting language imaginable.

  • Even though she goes to a job!

    When a mother leaves her kid in the daycare, in the hands of strangers, kid tend to loose the bond between the mother and a child!
    Even though she goes to a job, she works a whole day long and comes home by night or evening, and she will be tired, so doesn't even gets time to look upon the kid! The bond between the mother and the child in the initial stages of the child is very much essential and it's most crucial thing!

  • So they do not get hurt.

    Because if the mom goes and has someone that she does not now and if they leave that person could do something to that kid and you will not now about it unless you put cameres in the house in all of the rooms just so you can have poorf of it.

  • Bonding with a child is important

    Both the mother and the father of a child need to have a bond with them so that they aren’t like strangers to the child. However, if both parents leave for work and leave the child with babysitter or even alone, the parents will feel like strangers to the child because the child hasn’t spent much time with either of the parents. Therefore, the mother of any child should not only stay to bond with the child, but also help it grow and always remember the parent.

  • New born Babies

    "NEED" the sense of touch especially from their mothers and if mothers go to work who will teach their children what is right and what it wrong. I say that women who have children and all mothers should stay at home and watch their children and take care of them, and i know that some people might say that a caretaker could do the same, but that is wrong if a caretaker takes care of a mother's child they wont go the way the parents want them to grow, also mothers cannot see their child grow and will not have any memories of their child growing up with knowledge and strength to face life. If a family has a sufficient living and the man of the house gets a good and just wage and the whole family can live happily why should the women go to work, not only is it adding stress to the women going to work but it is also harming the child's family bond. Therefore i say that mother's should definitely stay at home and look after their children so they can grow up in good teachings and also when the parents children grows up they will take care of their parents just as they did and perhaps even more.

  • It is best for the child

    A lot of the times that a mother leaves their child in the hands of another person, the mother or any parent really becomes sort of like a stranger to the child, on example is well I. My parents have been leaving me home alone since I was 4, so it is kinda strange having them around and I feel like I prefer to be by myself at the time, I can't even do my homework 1/2 the time since they seem more like a stranger to me than a parent. But all in all I learned to be independent and learned how to cook at 5 so I guessed it worked out well, they can do what they want either way it'll just be harder for the parents or mom to have the bond that they should, it'll be as if they weren't really family.

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